The Family Attachment Center
The Family Attachment Center (FACe) is a non-profit counseling center for families
who have children ages 0-17 years. We provide a variety of Family Therapy
Modalities along with Parent Education designed to fit the individual needs of our
clients. We have parenting courses for biological, the single parent, foster and
adoptive parents and the blended family. We work collaboratively with schools and
childcare centers, from a partnership perspective, providing training and coaching to
teachers, school counselors, and childcare workers who also work with these children
who have difficult problems. We also offer specific programs for Child Care Staff as
well as the children in the Child Care Centers whom they serve.
Please View Our Services Page!!!
FACe's Mission Statement
FACe is a major contributor in creating a child-friendly, child-valuable, safe,
spiritually-connected community. In order to achieve this, FACe will work to convert
violence at its root and enhance loving, caring, productive individuals and happy
families by working with the emotionally disturbed child and family in synchronicity.
| Understanding Attachment
When we grasp the concept of attachment as the internalized parent, we begin to
understand the significance of the relationship between the child and his or her
biological parents starting in the womb. We grasp the concept that every child is not
just looking for love and not just looking for love from any adult, but a deep,
unconditional love from his or her biological parents. We also begin to understand
that no one can ever take the place of that child’s biological parent. Every child
finds his or her identity in the relationship they form or don’t form with their
biological parents. The child’s belief about him or herself is directly correlated with
how the child is treated by his or her parents. Our self-esteem, our self-identity, and
our beliefs about the world are all rooted in the relationship our biological parents
form with us. When children are mistreated stepping stones towards success in
school and becoming loving, productive adults become huge obstacles in life.
Healing from child abuse and neglect can easily become a life-long task.
When there is further understanding of attachment as the foundation of life and the
internalized infrastructure system each of us operates out of; we begin to understand
the manifestations of both positive attachment as well as the manifestations of poor
attachment. All of us behave according to our internal beliefs about others,
ourselves, and the world. It is not a mystery that there is a direct correlation
between aggression and how that individual feels about him or herself. When a child
does not feel loved by the individuals, who are most important to them, their
BIOLOGICAL parents, they are filled with deep hurt and sadness. That deep hurt,
sadness, fear, and grief is defended by anger, rage, and sometimes, even
aggression. When we have been rejected and maltreated by the ones we are
supposed to have the deepest trust and feel the most love, it creates a false
identity. This false identity “acts out” in ways that can seem very surprising and
even devastating to those who are attempting to love the child.
The adoptive parent can feel rejected, deeply hurt, and even angry towards the child
personalizing all of the child’s “acting out” behavior. When the adult personalizes
the child’s behavior, it perpetuates the “acting out” behavior and allows the child to
project all of his or her internal behaviors and beliefs continuously onto the adult.
This turns into a tumultuous relationship that neither the child nor the parent wants.
When this tumultuous relationship filled with power struggles, discord towards each
other, and aggression-avoidance dynamics continue; it is only a matter of time that
the adoptive parent wants to disrupt the adoption, avoid the child, the child avoids
the parent, or both the child and parent become very emotionally disconnected.